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Chapters - NOT the bookstore

I feel like I could muster up something quite clever to write if only I could perhaps stop my brain from thinking of the twenty zillion things that it already has in its head.

When I was a much regular blogger - (when perhaps I didn't have a job that was fufilling or friends to socilize with - although, not to suggest those who do blog regularly do not have those things; only simply that I am too weak and disorganised and distracted to pull it all together) - I used to contemplate a lot.

What would be. What is. What could be. When would it be.

Now, I'm just living in it. Living it. Loving it.

I wish I could somehow make a transition more effectively from 'nomadic-travelling-girl' to 'career-city-girl' in blogging zone. It's like I feel my words only have their place if I'm off on some adventure.

I used to hate my career city girl life before. Loathe. Loathe. Loathe.

Now, I can't get enough of it. So much so, I really begin to second guess myself on the kid thing.

Part me bounces off on occasion to 'when we move to Asia' or 'when we relocate to Kenya', as if, this is just a pit stop. As if, this is not the life I am so digging right now.

Sometimes, I feel like I have so much time ahead of me. Still slipping by in my 20s (barely), I feel like this is just a chapter in my life that will eventually close, allowing me to get back to the backpacking, free living lifestyle I had fallen in love with.

But most of the time, I'm so focussed on my job and my life in Belfast, that I'm not even thinking about moving on. About challenging myself again.

Because I already feel challenged. Except, in a stable environment.

I gotta tell ya, never thought THAT would happen.

I remember having an honest conversation with E (mother to The Kid) about being terrified that what if I never found happiness being one place? What if my Gemini life had left me destined to always look for the greener grass? Always want to uproot and find a new home?

So far, so good, Belfast. And thanks for the D thing. It has made a world of difference.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thanks for the mention. So glad you're in a good spot (even if it means you don't blog as regularly!!)
Love,
E, Mother of The Kid (my favourite profession)
Anonymous said…
i read your blog in awe...

but i especially hate it because you've managed to spread your wings and just take off abe somewhere else. everyday i wish and i hope but i know i will never be able to do it...

arbaiya - http://www.arbaiya.com

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