Skip to main content

Things I Am Accepting About Me

As I approach 30, I begin to think about the personality traits I have that I don't think I can ever change.

It's not about giving up, more about letting go.

I am so competitive - The only board game I can play without getting agressive and red faced is Trivial Pursuit, and that's because it feels less like a game and more like a 'joint learning experience'.

I am crap at being alone - I need about 30 minutes alone time a day. This can be easily achieved on my walk to work and on the bus. I can go for about 5 waking hours not speaking to another human being but after that, I just start speaking to myself. After a day, I start reinventing my childhood imaginary friend Jenny. Although, she never really talked that much, just listened to all my wisdom. (With you're imaginary friends, you are always right)

I am a non-conformist who hates breaking the rules - I was a goody goody as a child, rarely got in trouble, always was saying sorry and was deathly afraid of police officers.

I hate, however, having to WANT to do things 'because everyone else WANTS TO DO THEM' ie, get a marketing degree if I want to work in marketing, buy a house because I'm over the age of 25, get married because I've been with my partner for more than 5 years. Have a baby because my clock is ticking.

My mother always said I was fiercly independent when it came to decisions. I will do these things IF I want to and WHEN I want to.

I can only go shopping ALONE for about 2 hours max - This is perhaps my 'alone' time. I'm a bit selfish, I'm sorry, but I have trouble getting excited about other people's clothes. Heck, I can't even get excited about my own clothes. I just keep thinking, 'that 20 quid could go a long way in Greece...'

I can get excited about a boy you met or a job interview you went on or some gossip you have about that bitchy girl in high school but how great you look in that skirt? Five words really: Yeah, great, can we go?

I just don't find this an enjoyable social outing. I find this more a mission-impossible-style event. Need an outfit. Scour the shops. Get the goods. Get out. As. fast. as. you. can.

I have trouble being wrong - It rarely happens, however, so really, this one doesn't really need to be analysed.

I'm a Gemini who has two sides to every story - This must be why I loved debating politics in my early twenties. I could see both sides because, hey, us twins can really never decide what we want.

I will always over analyse - And myself is no exception to this rule. I have a keen curiosity about the human spirit.

And an intense desire to truly understand each facet of society.

Out of all these revelations, there is the one I'm most happy with:

I'm comfortable with me - I must admit, I can't remember a time being uncomfortable with me.

I'm glad some things never change.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Focus

My regular journaling has significantly improved my mood.

I've been taking some time, twice a week, to polish existing content as well as develop my floating ideas into a more concrete outline.

I've felt this focus for the last 6 weeks that I can't really describe properly. It's as though I've shifted my thinking totally. Writing is my craft. It's what I do, who I am, how I exist. It's like my mojo.

So, I guess, I've gotten my mojo back. My focus, my purpose, my essence.

And it feels good. It feels right. And I am almost understanding more now why the best writing of the best writers happens when they are older, more polished, more experienced, more rough around the edges.

When all the youthful spark has been extinguished and what's left, is the determined embers, that will not go softly, that will not die out. That will continue, fervently glowing, creating warmth and not just drawing attention from its flicker, but pulling people in by it's so…

Room with a view

We've been in our new home for 10 weeks nos and it's feeling more like home than ever.Every day, I sit down at my desk to the most inspiring view.A collection of stories is building. This space makes it easy to gather my thoughts.I've been consumed with a few work projects and am looking forward to collecting my thoughts soon.Writers club is still going ... I was on a bit of a hiatus but hope to get into my routine for fall. For now, boat gazing is helping.

One thing

It's that time of year again. That time when we all decide to become a little more of our better selves.

It's a good time of year to commit to something, even if just to say you're going to try to make it happen. And, even if things don't change and perhaps you even fail at whatever you were resolving, it's actually just the action of pledging change that really brings the most benefit.

And so, this year, as I'm sure most writers are pledging, I pledge to WRITE. MORE.

Not necessarily blog more. But write more. Keep the act of it going. Commit to treating it as my craft instead of my hobby. Promising to keep it a hobby at heart but a skill in practice.

I've started a daily journal again - one page per day -- of anything, really mostly a rundown of what I did that day. Or heck, even a bit of stream of consciousness of what's banging around in the old head that day.



I also bought another daily Q&A book that, if I'm successful, will carry me across…