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What Beds?I Don't See No Stinking Beds?

Some of you who have known me for a long time (and even those who have could probably guess I would have had some sort of neurosis) know that I'm a bit precious when it comes to sleep.

As a young child, I would wake up in the middle of the night, disoriented and sleepy, launch myself into a full fledge panic-anxiety attack and wake up my hardworking parents, who, through sleepy eyes, always tried to comfort me and let me know it was okay to just 'go back to sleep'.

I have been through bouts of insomnia, which always resulted in me eventually becoming so exhausted that I just fell a asleep after a couple of weeks or so. In my twenties, a bottle of Chardonnay usually did the trick.

I remember distinctly when my sleeping patterns became 'abnormal'. It was on a New Year's Eve, sitting in the tv room, doing the traditional V new year's party - movies and more food than you could eat in a month - and I begged to stay up with my parents to watch their movie, Purple Rain.

The problem occured when I fell asleep on the couch and woke up, only to see the last 5 minutes of the movie.

I had no real conception that I had been asleep and I demanded to know why the movie was only 5 minutes long?? What kind of movie was that? What kind of magician trick had just occured??? (perhaps this is also where my hatred for magicians comes from) Why were my parents tryting to PRETEND they had watched the movie, only to REALLY watch it again when they thought they had fooled me back to bed!!

WHY WHY WHY??????????

So began the saga of my delicate sleep patterns. Insomina hit me again when I moved in with D and I had to get used to sleeping next to someone full time and also the fact that we didn't read our books before sleep but watched TV.

I put my foot down after the 3 week bout passed and have been a bedtime-reading, no-tv-in-the-bedroom type sleeper.

And I haven't had a problem since.

And the story does not now go in the direction of 'but now i am' but it could very well if the heat doesn't die down just a little bit.

Our apartment, luxurious, spacious and so wonderful, is fitted with an air con unit that only leaves the TV room cool. Since the heat wave hit we've taken our mattresses and placed them on the floor of the living room.

It's a bit disconserting for me to basically LIVE in one room. I keep joking with D that I AM going to go postal if we can't at least get back to the bedroom.

(and again, I do, in NO WAY mean that I want it to get cold. Just cooler. You know, cool enough to get our living room back)

But, dedicated readers, have no fear. Because I have found the solution to trick myself. Just take look at this picture.

See? FOLDING the blankets and PLACING them at the end of the beds really just makes the whole room feel like WE'RE NOT SLEEPING HERE!

Move along, these are not the beds your looking for.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Hey A, maybe you should adopt the phrase "We don't NEED no stinkin' beds" and sleep on the couches. Too 90's? Hope the weather breaks for you soon. Has anybody actually said it will? luv ms

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