I'm discovering yet one more teacher task that is much more difficult than I could have ever imagined.
Do you remember when you would get your report card? If you were a big nerd like me, you were waiting to read all the insightful and poignant words that you teachers would have written about you. Waiting to hear how they thought you were a 'genuis' and felt 'immensley fortunate' to have such a 'incredibly studious' student among their presence.
I'm in the middle of doing the kindergarten reports and I'm realising there are only so many ways to say 'you're kid's doing great' or 'you're kid needs to practice more' or 'your kid needs to stop punching all the other kids so he can avoid spending the entire class in the corner and then maybe he could actually LEARN something'.
Here's a few phrases that I've been using - translated from teacher speak to teacher thoughts in case any of you can't read between the lines.
"Bobby is an excitable boy"
Bobby spends most of his time running around the classroom, trying to make trades with his coloring pencils or candy-of-the-day. Please stop sending in so much sugar.
"Nancy is easily distracted but once focused, completes tasks on time"
Nancy spends most of the class staring at the wall, at other students and occasionally down at her paper. I'm not sure she actually REALIZES her name is Nancy, considering how many times I have to ask her IN MY OUTSIDE VOICE to pay attention and stop tapping her pencil on whatever seems to be intriguing her that day.
"Mandy is not afraid to approach me outside of class to speak English"
...that English being 'Teacher, can I have that chocolate? Teacher is that candy on your desk? Teacher, can I be the Captain today? Teacher GAME!!'
"Jeff is progressing nicely"
Jeff is neither bad or good and a slightly forgetable child.
I mean no offense and now, when and if I become a parent, will never actually be able to read these things in the same way.
Ignorance was bliss. Now, my children's report cards will be a source of nostalgia.
And amusement.
Do you remember when you would get your report card? If you were a big nerd like me, you were waiting to read all the insightful and poignant words that you teachers would have written about you. Waiting to hear how they thought you were a 'genuis' and felt 'immensley fortunate' to have such a 'incredibly studious' student among their presence.
I'm in the middle of doing the kindergarten reports and I'm realising there are only so many ways to say 'you're kid's doing great' or 'you're kid needs to practice more' or 'your kid needs to stop punching all the other kids so he can avoid spending the entire class in the corner and then maybe he could actually LEARN something'.
Here's a few phrases that I've been using - translated from teacher speak to teacher thoughts in case any of you can't read between the lines.
"Bobby is an excitable boy"
Bobby spends most of his time running around the classroom, trying to make trades with his coloring pencils or candy-of-the-day. Please stop sending in so much sugar.
"Nancy is easily distracted but once focused, completes tasks on time"
Nancy spends most of the class staring at the wall, at other students and occasionally down at her paper. I'm not sure she actually REALIZES her name is Nancy, considering how many times I have to ask her IN MY OUTSIDE VOICE to pay attention and stop tapping her pencil on whatever seems to be intriguing her that day.
"Mandy is not afraid to approach me outside of class to speak English"
...that English being 'Teacher, can I have that chocolate? Teacher is that candy on your desk? Teacher, can I be the Captain today? Teacher GAME!!'
"Jeff is progressing nicely"
Jeff is neither bad or good and a slightly forgetable child.
I mean no offense and now, when and if I become a parent, will never actually be able to read these things in the same way.
Ignorance was bliss. Now, my children's report cards will be a source of nostalgia.
And amusement.
Comments
i'm still full from last night i think.:)