Coulda Woulda Shoulda

Dear Belfast Car Theives Thanks you SO F**IN much for not only breaking into our car when it was parked on the street 4 months ago, but managing to find a way to break into it WHILE IT WAS PARKED IN A SECURED UNDERGROUND LOT!! Thank you for breaking into a car that has nothing in it to steal except for the expensive and clearly worthwhile theif deterent 'the club', which clearly is so effective it can actually be taken off the steering wheel. Thank you for being absolute dicks. Thank you for sending us a sign.

I am no closer to clarity but I think I am farther away from puking than I was yesterday. You can go on doing your regular routine, quite easily, until you suddenly remember you have a decision to make. I would be prone to anxiety on a regular day and our adventures have actually helped to curb these feelings. I find myself less and less scared and more prepared to take things on. It's not that I'm not petrified, it's that I know at the end of the day, anything is better than being dead. This may sound morbid. Or insulting. But I don't mean it like that. I'm a practical person, even more so living with someone like D. I have never looked at situations with much hope or belief that someone else will make it all make sense. So when I tackle a problem head on, I like to be as realistic as possible. There are people who are dead who would have loved the opportunties that come my way. And so who am I to not explore them? So, I'm doing it for the dead.

I feel sick to my stomach. I just got some really interesting news that is very exciting and scary all at the same time. (For those of you who know me no, i'm not engaged and no i'm not pregnant and no i'm not buying a house and no i'm not moving home) It's that type of news I can't really discuss and but I just had to blog this moment because my stomach is in such knots. I've been waiting for this news for a couple of months now and it feels weird that it just arrived the way it did. D is away for work tonight and I just wish the two if us to flitter off and discuss. Oh Internet, life really IS wonderful thing.

I have written before about my annoyance of the driving habits of those in the UK. To refresh, they don't stop for pedestrians EVER. THE END. (This excludes a 'zebra (say debra) crossing' where pedestrians get their revenge and can step out in front of a speeding car, which will screech to a halt because the pedestrian does rule there) There aren't '4 way stops' here but if you imagine the '4 way stop' then without any signs except for the lines on the road which I'm not quite clear about rights of way but stay with me.. So imagining these intersections, if a pedestrian in Canada was standing at the corner, the car would stop to let them by. If you attempt to make eye contact with a driver and step in front of their car, lasers will come out of their eye with anger at the audacity YOU have to try and cross the street. What makes it all that more frustrating is that IT PISSES RAIN HERE ALL THE TIME. And so you have pedestrians, cowing to cars like cit...

Looking to become a kid again. Want to take my pocket money to the candy store and have the biggest decision I have to make in the day be whether or not to get dill pickle chips or the blue shark gummy treats. Want to bring the ghetto blaster out on the front lawn, make up dance routines and test each other. Want to spend the day practicing magic tricks for the circus show to the audience of my parents. Want to ride my bike all over the town, lifting my hands off the handlebars going down hills, stopping at parks along the way to swing on swings and climb down slides. Want to go swimming in the afternoon, eat snackies and things and sun bath until dinner time - summer time favourites such as corn on the cob, green beans and BBQed steak. The sun was out all weekend. I'm in escaping mode. And what better place to escape to then I place I already know I love...my childhood.

Looking to become a kid again. Want to take my pocket money to the candy store and have the biggest decision I have to make in the day be whether or not to get dill pickle chips or the blue shark gummy treats. Want to bring the ghetto blaster out on the front lawn, make up dance routines and test each other. Want to spend the day practicing magic tricks for the circus show to the audience of my parents. Want to ride my bike all over the town, lifting my hands off the handlebars going down hills, stopping at parks along the way to swing on swings and climb down slides. Want to go swimming in the afternoon, eat snackies and things and sun bath until dinner time - summer time favourites such as corn on the cob, green beans and BBQed steak. The sun was out all weekend. I'm in escaping mode. And what better place to escape to then I place I already know I love...my childhood.

There is nothing cuter than a little boy pretending to be a grown up. This is from Christmas and he is much bigger now but I figured it would be fun to debut The Kid on a day when I know I should be writing more but just can't bring myself to find the time. Tyeger - stay cute. Someday, you'll have a big boy smoking jacket that you can walk around in swirling your whiskey and puffing on your pipe. Until then, just stick to the chocolate - I understand you're a big fan since the Easter Bunny arrived last weekend. Has something replaced your love for the 'yellow bus' your uncle M drives? ** Shout out to Vernon where my pen pal friend has just welcomed to the world as of yesterday her little bundle of joy. Mom and daughter are doing fine. Now, if only they could decide on a name...hmmm... Way to go A and R! To many years of laughter and tears. ** I've been reading a couple of books lately that have really made me think quite a lot. Most of my leisure brain power ha...

I remember a time when every day, I would have to get up, go into a newsroom and write. In between phone calls and interviews and cigarettes, my soul purpose at work was to string words together. Almost 10 years on and I have no idea how I did that. Have I killed so many brain cells with Budweiser, cigarettes, draft beer, tequila shots, more cigarettes, red wine and G&Ts that I find it a struggle to string some creative words together on a daily basis? Most women stress and worry about the look fading. Can-you-see-my-wrinkles and do-i-look-fat-in-this type things Me? I worry about why it is that I used to be able write three to four different stories a day that now, I can't even find the energy to write a few sentences. Let's hope it's the jet lag.

It amazes me that my intentions were to post entries on the busiest days of my hoilday. It would have been great to recap, day by day, all the emotions that were raging around during those days. A recap of events is probably the easiest. Wednesday night Madness - my father's side of the family put the party on for my sister and my new brother in law (okay THAT is weird). As we walked in the door, there were lots of AHHHHHHHs and arms raised it triumphant position only to be wrapped around us with bear hugs. I was so excited that I missed the bride completely as she tried to hug me. Whoops. Bridesmaid mistake numero uno. Thursday Practice Time - the rehersal was brief and we learned later why maybe that wasn't such a good thing. It started to kick in that my sister was ACTUALLY GOING TO WALK DOWN AN AISLE when she walked down the middle of the empty function room at the hotel we were staying at. The after party was full on. Great food, great company, great booze and great goodne...