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A Little Hoarse, of Course

Alice the Camel has 5 humps....

(all the way to)

Alice the camel has NO humps now Alice is a HORSE! NEIGHHHHHHHHHHH!

Every day I end my kindergarten classes with this classic and it goes down like a house on fire.

After 7 days of kindergarten, the other thing that is going down quickly is my little voice.

YES people who know me MY VOICE IS NOW LITTLE! I can hardly speak anymore and as I write, can actually feel my vocal chords BEGGING me not to say one...more...word.

I can just imagine the number of people I know across the planet letting out a huge guffaw and a sigh of relief, to think that FOR ONCE I have no choice but to JUST..SHUT..UP.

I suppose I can also take solace in the fact that my fingers aren't broken, as my Uncle D has often accused me of having when I haven't written in awhile and so, I can continue to blather on in writing and simply hope that this will sustain me until my BIG voice comes back.

I've been reading some things about kindergarten teaching, as many of my new students have never been to school before and have NEVER spoken English.

A few tips include:

"Speak at a lower tone so that children know they shouldn't be yelling in the classroom." Uh WHAT?? Okay, I'll just WHISPER for 40 minutes asking them to sit down and be quiet. I'm sure the zero percent chance they will have of hearing me will REALLY help to make the classroom a calm environment.

"Make sure the children know they must sit in their desks for class and that this is not a playroom." Yes, do that IN THEIR SECOND LANGUAGE USING YOUR QUIET VOICE.

"This craft should take no longer than 30 minutes." Dear author, you should be shot. You should also try to do the craft with HUMAN 6 year olds, not the robot ones you clearly tested your craft on.

"Songs are a great way for children to learn English." Yes they are. They are also a great way for teacher to lose her voice, her patience and her mind while trying to control 12 six year olds as they run around the room, screaming at the top of their lungs about Alice and her damn humps.

They're lucky they're cute.

Comments

Anonymous said…
not going talk...did I just see a pig go by the window?

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